Still A 'Grasshopper'

With respect to some advice I received long, long ago from a mentor, I go through life more a learner than a teacher. These are some things I have learned of late:

• This one really caught me by surprise: my Sandy is now a prolific fan of country music. This pains me to no end as I just have never been able to get it. Let’s just say I’m open (last word spoken carefully and drawn out). One of her girlfriends (may she find ants in her fruit loops tomorrow) plugged her into that nonsense and now she romances me with the phrase, “I’d like to check you for ticks.” I dunno, I think that’s a good thing? Seems the old girl and I are living the famous Donnie and Marie duet.
  

• Jerald tells me my blog is R-rated according to mingle2.com. Seems I’ve used some no-no words like “dead”, “pain”, “kill” and “bomb” in some of my posts. Sorry folks, I’ll clean it up. This just kills me! (Doh!)
  
  
• Studies show if a cat falls off the seventh floor of a building it has about 30% less chance of surviving than a cat that falls off the twentieth floor—seems it takes a cat about eight floors to realize what is happening and to adjust and right itself
  
  
• In every episode of Seinfeld, you can spot a Superman figure or picture
  
  
• The chess term “checkmate” is derived from the Persian Shah Mat which means ‘the king is dead’
  
  
• To my horror, I recently discovered a blog featuring the smuttiest of porn news had linked to one of my posts (800 Pacos, June 19th)…evidently the lines “Believe me, you are being lied to. That bottle sitting by your bedside. That strange woman you are bedding. Or want to. That next fix you are dying for. The invitation you received to that wild party. Even your vain philosophy. The code you live by: I’m the Captain of My Soul. The estrangement from your family. The penthouse, the pearls, the pools. The porn, the booze” got its attention, perhaps to mock me? Who knows, mebbe it’ll turn out to be a good thing and someone will find deliverance through a pagan medium. And, no, I will not tell you the site.

• Silly thing, I know, but I did just learn that “Big Ben” is named for the bell in the tower, not the clock
  
  
• A duck’s quack doesn’t echo and nobody knows why
  
  
• Bert and Ernie, renowned pals on Sesame Street, were both named for It’s A Wonderful Life characters: Bert the cop and Ernie the taxi driver
  
  
• The phrase “rule of thumb” comes from an old English law that says you cannot beat your wife with anything wider than your thumb
  
  
• The plane in which Buddy Holly died was called “American Pie”, hence, the title of Don McLean’s famous song